My Faith

My faith is not something I've ever wanted to write about on my blog.  Well, actually it is, but it's not something I've perhaps had enough courage to write about.  Talking about religion or Christianity sometimes doesn't go over so well (just ask Tim Tebow), and in general I try to keep my blog about light topics - training, racing, Roxy (the dog) and other such things.  In a way, I'm a deeply private person.  I know it doesn't seem like it when I've been blabbing about all my comings and goings for the last 8-9 years on my blog.  But 99% of my blogs are superficial.  Which is the way I like it.  Again, I'm a private person.

Still, recently I can't get the idea of writing about my faith out of my head.

Humpf.

I don't really even know what to write!  (how's that for a good blog post?)  I guess mostly I just want to write about the importance of God in my life and how my faith and belief in God is what drives me, motivates me, directs all my decisions and makes me get out of bed each morning.  Yes I know, you thought TRIATHLON did all that.  Not quite.  :)

I'm a relatively new Christian.  I didn't understand God or who Jesus really was until I was college-aged.  I had a roommate my freshman year in college who was a very faithful Christian and I would go to church with her all the time, not really understanding ANYTHING that was going on.  I remember one time taking a bus trip to the Raleigh Relays in college (which were held at NC State) and it was around Easter.  I wanted to read about what happened at Easter in the Bible but I didn't even know where to look so I asked a teammate.  The thought of that just makes me laugh!  I've now read through the Gospels and the details of Jesus' death and resurrection hundreds of times.  I guess we all start somewhere.

I kept going to church with my teammate and somewhere along the way met Oscar and he would go with us too.  Oscar was already a strong Christian and would really help me understand what this stuff was all about!  At which time I would finally come to the point of understanding that being a Christian meant that I believed Jesus died on the cross for MY sins and that he arose from the grave on that 3rd day.  It wasn't a hard decision to come to.  Once I understood, I knew in my heart it was true.

Since college I've certainly done a lot of growing and learning and maturing and I will continue to do so for the rest of my days here on this earth.  I still shake my head at some of the stupid things I do or say.  Hurtful things or prideful things or selfish things.  I am far from perfect and never will be but with God's strength, will improve a little each day.

I know Christian athletes take a lot of heat.  Ryan Hall does.  Tim Tebow does.  People say that God doesn't really care if Denver wins or not.  Or if Ryan makes it to the Olympics.  But He does!  That's the funny thing about all the criticism.  God cares deeply about every single detail of all of our lives.  Ryan and Tim and many other athletes have been given great gifts and they glorify God by using those gifts.  You don't think God cares about that?

I also know God cares about me, about my racing, about my marriage, about the relationships I have with others, how I treat people and how I react to life's situations.  He cares about all my prayers, about the decisions I make and about the path I take in life.  And THAT is what drives me.  I want to glorify Him when I race.  I want to work hard in training and in my job to be the best version of myself.  I pray each morning for the strength to be the triathlete, the daughter, the wife, the dietitian that He wants me to be.

I'm certain I'm not making much sense.  I'm also certain I've probably lost a lot of readers by now.  :)  It's a hard topic for me to broach even though it's THE most important topic I could ever write about.  It's just seems very difficult for me to adequately describe something as big and amazing as our God.

I guess that's why I like Hillsong.  They do a very good job of singing it.  :)  One of my all time favorite songs (that I sometimes listen to on repeat for HOURS on my trainer) is Forever Reign.  Here's a YouTube video of them and below that, the lyrics of the song with my editorial notes.  :)

You are good, You are good
When there's nothing good in me (definitely nothing good in me)

You are love, You are love
On display for all to see

You are light, You are light
When the darkness closes in

You are hope, You are hope
You have covered all my sin

You are peace, You are peace
When my fear is crippling (I don't understand how one lives without God's comforting care?)

You are true, You are true
Even in my wandering (and I've had a lot of wandering)

You are joy, You are joy
You're the reason that I sing (you won't catch me singing any other time, thankfully :)

You are life, You are life,
In You death has lost its sting (no reason to fear death)

Oh, I’m running to Your arms,
I’m running to Your arms

The riches of Your love
Will always be enough
Nothing compares to Your embrace (nothing ever, ever will)
Light of the world forever reign

You are more, You are more
Than my words will ever say
You are Lord, You are Lord
All creation will proclaim

You are here, You are here
In Your presence I'm made whole (no win, no PR, no accolade, no relationship with others, no materal thing... makes us whole)

You are God, You are God
Of all else I'm letting go (true bliss when you can just let go...)

Oh, I’m running to Your arms
I’m running to Your arms

The riches of Your love
Will always be enough

Nothing compares to Your embrace
Light of the world forever reign

My heart will sing
no other Name
Jesus, Jesus

So, that's my weak attempt at writing about my faith and about our awesome God.  I'm sure many people don't agree.  This is the stuff wars are fought over.  But it is what I know to be true.  And it is what I know to be right.  And it is what I know to be my purpose in this world.  And now you know a little bit more about me.  :)